Mother’s bond with her children

I don’t think there’s anything stonger than the bond between a mother and her children.

I know my boys inside out. I know what they like to do, what they like to eat and what makes them happy and sad (well most of the time anyway!)

I know it won’t always be this way and as they grow I won’t know where they are all of the time or what they are thinking. That transition will be tough but I hope they will know that I’ll always be there for them.

Mops wrote down the reasons why he loves his Mum at school this week. Here goes:

  • She’s kind to me
  • She let’s me play on my DS XL (Laughed how this one made it so high up on the list!)
  • She reads me bedtime stories
  • Nice food

Let’s hope he always thinks I make ‘nice food’ and pops in for a roast dinner on a Sunday once he has flown the nest!

Thanks boys for making me smile everyday, I love you to the moon and back!

Happy Mother’s Day to all the lovely Mums out there!

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‘Don’t worry you’re not last!’

A few years ago I ran my first ever half marathon.  I ran with a friend for a charity and I have to say it really was one of the toughest 2.5 hours of my life. Ok, ok, so maybe not as tough as childbirth, particularly boy number one, but even so it was a tough couple of hours.  I remember sitting down on the tube platform after the race waiting for my train thinking I don’t think I’m going to be able to get up to get on the train. My stomach was hurting and I felt faint. It was then that I swore I would never run a half marathon again. I convinced myself that actually it wasn’t for me, I just wasn’t built for it.

So why yesterday did I find myself attempting to run a half marathon again! This time a few years older but clearly not wiser and on my own. Well not totally on my own as 1,999 other people were running too but I wasn’t running with a buddy.

Running a half marathon is tough, both mentally and physically. Training for it is also tough. Hauling my bottom off the sofa over the Christmas period was tricky…but I wanted to do this!

When I arrived at the start line yesterday morning it was bloody freezing – minus 4! The sun was shining and the atmosphere was building. I felt self conscious, standing at the start line on my own…no running belt, no gels, no buddies and I was clutching my phone. Fortunately, a lovely fellow runner, also clutching her phone, started chatting to me about the run and then I felt a bit more comfortable.

Within a few minutes we were off, my new running buddy and I spent the first 5 miles together chatting. The running community is an amazing bunch, everybody is so supportive and caring.

Once I left my running buddy, I was on my own..running around my home town as I have done many times before but this time was different, I was racing, I was proving to myself that I could do this! (again!)

I actually spent the rest of the run on my own, with the odd ‘keep going’ from fellow runners. I was also very lucky to have some supporters that braved the cold to cheer me on. Just knowing that I had friends dotted around the course kept me motivated to continue.

When I got to mile 11, I could have easily given up. I had only run up to mile 11 in training so mentally I thought that I wouldn’t be able to run any further. There was a small hill ahead, I was tired. I had pushed myself to go this far but wasn’t sure if I could continue for that extra mile or two! When you reach that point it’s tough, especially when you are running on your own.

But ,I did keep going, the thought of my boys at the finish line and a hot bubble bath were enough, I was determined to run the last two miles and make them proud!

They were there at the finish line, shouting ‘Mum’ and saying ‘don’t worry, you’re not last’.

I had done it, I had reached the finish line…I was faster than when I ran a half marathon three years ago and I felt better physically too. So last night I felt proud, I hope that my boys did too.

Oh and the bubble bath was the best bubble bath I have EVER had!

When your child is diagnosed with epilepsy.

At the point of diagnosis Bam was having about 10 seizures a day. He would suddenly lose consciousness and fall to the floor. We would then have that agonising few second wait (which felt like much longer) for Bam to come back to us. It’s really scary seeing your child unconscious, not knowing how long the seizure will last for. I felt helpless.  When the seizure finished all I wanted to do was hold him tight but that’s the last thing he wanted. He was confused, tired and disorientated, he needed time to recover.

We realised shortly after diagnosis that Bam was also having absence seizures as well as drop down seizures. My poor boy was having several seizures per day leaving him confused and exhausted.

I desperately wanted to know more about epilepsy and how I could help Bam. There’s so much information out there but I found it very overwhelming and confusing. For a start there are over 40 different types of seizure!

When Young Epilepsy asked me to blog about their new guide on childhood epilepsy I was keen to help. I’m pleased to say it’s pretty impressive! I wish this was available when Bam was diagnosed. It has everything you need to know from details about the different types of seizure through to the medications that are available.

Personally I found the section on the impact that epilepsy can have on learning and behaviour of particular interest. Bam has Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) in addition to epilepsy. I had no idea that 20-40% of children with epilepsy also have ADHD! The guide also explains how children with epilepsy can be anxious, find they have a lack of independence, a low self esteem and a lack of confidence. So it’s not just about the seizures….

The Young Epilepsy guide talks through each of the issues that children with epilepsy can experience and how parents can help their children manage these challenges. I highly recommend this guide to other parents of children with epilepsy, it’s informative and easy to read.

Finding out your child has epilepsy is tough. Having information such as the guide that Young Epilepsy has published is really helpful. It’ll help guide you through what sometimes can be a tough journey.

Juggling act

I’m no circus performer but any parent will be an expert at juggling. Raising kids, running a house, working, a social life and ‘me’ time. Oh and then there’s the washing, this is actually a part time job in itself – where on earth does it all come from?!

Unfortunately planning a social life and ‘me’ time tends to be put to the bottom of the pile. Who has time to plan a social life and as for ‘me’ time well that’s normally 9pm to 10pm catching up on the days events on facebook or maybe a bit of TV.

I love my job and I love my kids but juggling the two and ‘life’ can and does have it challenges, particularly when the two cross over as it did for me just before Christmas.

Picture the scene….I’m wandering around the lake on my day off from work with my lovely friend, her two boys, my two boys and her dog. The boys were running, enjoying the freedom and the dog was joining in the fun.

The dog then spotted a rubber ball in the stream that somebody had left there.  One of the boys grabbed it out of the stream and started throwing the ball for the very excited dog. There were lots of giggles and shouting…cue my mobile ringing…a work call. I quickly say to my friend ‘it’s a work call, I just need to get this’.

I’m chatting to my colleague, the giggling and shouting still around me. Without warning, I suddenly have this hard bang to the back of my head! Mops had thrown the ball for the dog and it had hit me on the head….really hard….in fact it was eye wateringly hard. In a stunned state I calmly let my colleague know that I have been hit on the head by a ball, just to cover for my short delay in responding. In normal circumstances I would have let out a little bit of a scream or an ouch but something inside me allows me to remain professional or may be I was still in a stunned state!

My friend at this point is chuckling away…but I’m determined, I can remain professional. I complete the call. We both have a chuckle…..my hair is dishevelled, with a splattering of mud and stream water – a small reminder of how glamorous motherhood can be!

So keeping all of the juggling balls of life in the air has its challenges but its ok if we drop one every now and then…well as long as it doesn’t whack you on the back of the head!

This post is dedicated to my lovely, lovely, friend – thanks for always being there xxx

New year’s resolutions!

Happy new year… I’m sure I’m not the only one that is feeling tired today.  After a night of partying with friends and the kids it’s feels like it’s the longest day EVER. A fab night was had by all but I’m now sitting here wishing the kids bedtime to hurry up so I can go to bed too. We’re nearly there, aren’t we?

New year is always a time for reflection and a time to think about plans for the future. I don’t make new year’s resolutions as such but I do try to think of a few things that I’d like to achieve.  This year I am kicking the year off with a half marathon on the 22nd January. I also have plans to travel. Unfortunately not travelling around the world for weeks on end but at least a visit to a place that I have always wanted to go to rather than the cheapest package deal we can find in the outrageously expensive school holidays.

Out of interest I asked my boys about their new year’s resolutions. Bam’s response was to eat more chocolate. Good call Bam, life’s definitely better with chocolate. I did have a chuckle that while most people in the world are making promises to eat less, his is to eat more! He then followed up with ‘and I want to help people, more than I already do’. That’s my boy, he has a very kind heart.

Mops’ new year’s resolution is to go to more water parks (random!) and to have more money. Apparently he wants ‘better stuff’. I wonder what ‘better stuff’ means to a five year old?

Whether you make new years resolutions or not, I wish you all a very happy and healthy 2017! Is it bedtime yet…..zzzzzz!

Christmas: from a Mum’s perspective

At the end of November my family gave to me…a few days of internet searching for Black Friday deals for thee!

At the beginning of December my family gave to me….A few evenings of card writing glee!

On the 2nd week of December my family gave to me…A minor panic as I realised the Christmas Supermarket delivery slots were no longer free!

Also on the 2nd week of December my family gave to me….A Mums nights out or maybe three!

Also on the 2nd week of December my family gave to me….a nativity concert, a reindeer run and a carol concert to see!

Also on the 2nd week of December my family gave to me….decoration (firstly by the kids, then Mummy) of the Christmas tree!

On the 3rd week of December my family gave to me….Wrapping (what feels like) hundreds of presents for all of my family to receive!

Also on the 3rd week of December my family gave to me….A stinking cold for thee!

On the 25th December my family gave to me….children smiling, laughing and squealing with delight – what every Mum wants to see!

Now please somebody bring me a large cup of tea!!

Life in the fast lane…

I’ve been reflecting recently on the family life that Mops, my youngest boy, is part of. Life is very chaotic, loud and active. For him life has always been like that so I wonder if he actually realises his life might be ever so slightly different to his friends in the classroom?

He knows all about Bam’s conditions and how they affect him. He’s very open about them and will chat to his friends about it. He’s adapts brilliantly to life with Bam. He’s so patient, much more patient than anybody else living in our household! Even if he has to ask the same question to Bam five times over, he’ll do it and persevere. I wonder if that’s because he knows he needs to be patient or because that’s his normal.

I often wonder that as Mops gets older, he’ll begin to realise how he adapts to living with a brother with ADHD and epilepsy. Does he enjoy charging around all of the time with his brother, climbing trees, scooting, generally living life in the fast lane or is he wondering about the next time he’ll get to sit and relax? I suspect it’s probably a little bit of both!

This weekend I took Mops out for some lunch, just him and I. So as we sat in Subway munching on our sandwich creations we chatted about school, play, friends etc. It was as we were walking through town I asked Mops if he had enjoyed his lunch. His reply was very simple but very powerful ‘Yes Mum, I have, it’s been very relaxing!’ So he does like a bit of down time, just to sit, just to chill, just to be able to eat a sandwich rather than gulp it down.

He’s still very young (5) but I wonder how he’ll handle family life in the future. I have a feeling he’ll adapt, just as he always has. Love you Mops for everything you do and I know Bam does too.