You didn’t glance back?

Dearest Bam,

I know you didn’t glance back today after I kissed you goodbye. Why would you? You were full to the brim with excitement for your residential trip with the school. Chatting to your mates about Pokémon cards and which activities you were going to do. I heard you say ‘I’m going to do everything!’

I also heard you tell everybody that you had only had an hour’s sleep last night. Yes, that’s true, every hour waking me up to tell me the time and how many hours there were left until you head off on your adventure. I tried to calm you down but nothing worked. By 4.30am, I gave up and suggested you watched TV. Self preservation for sleep was beginning to kick in!

This morning you literally bounced around the house, causing great excitement in your brother too. I was silently wishing the time away, I was tired and a little sad that you were heading off on your own.

However, your enthusiasm for life makes me smile. I know you will put everything you have into enjoying your time outside climbing, swimming etc and return home absolutely exhausted at the end of the week.

I’m pleased that you go without a care in the world. I’m pleased I have done all the worrying for you. I’ve met with the teacher about your special needs – we discussed your medication and your specific requirements. I’ve googled how far away the hospital is just in case you have a seizure. I’ve worried about the fact you’ll be kayaking in the sea and I’ve worried that you won’t eat at lunchtime because of your ADHD medication. (The lovely teacher is taking some breakfast biscuits for you to munch on should you get peckish)

Off you go precious boy, have a blast! I’ll never stop worrying about you although I am looking forward to some sleep tonight. Oh and thanks for the letting me give you a kiss goodbye, even though ‘that’s embarrassing!’

I’ll miss you…

Love Mum xxxx

 

 

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Bam’s got talent!

Bam bounces out of school full of enthusiasm and excitement (yes, even more than usual!). The reason for his enthusiasm? He’s going to enter the school talent contest.

‘I need you to print off some jokes from the internet, I’m going to perform a comedy act’

Eek, it’s really hard to make people laugh, a little knot appears in my stomach but I muster up lots of encouragement and put my own fears to one side.

Hubby prints off some truly corny jokes – you know the ones that make you groan ‘What did the duvet say to the bed? Don’t worry, I’ve got you covered! Did that make you groan?

Bam sets to work planning his script for the auditions. He works really, really hard. Night after night he sits in his bed planning and writing.

The day of the auditions arrives. I’m in awe of his confidence, there is no doubt in his mind that he has this nailed.

I’m working all day on the day of the auditions, so I ask him to text me from Mum’s phone as she is collecting him from school. School kicking out time arrives and I eagerly await the text. My phone rings…..he’s done it!!! He’s got through. 12 people out of 200 were chosen….he’s as high as a kite. So he should be, what an amazing achievement.

More nights of writing and rehearsing ahead to prepare himself  for the finals. I’m oozing with pride, having the confidence to get up and perform in front of his peers is amazing.

He didn’t win in the finals but that didn’t matter. People voted for him – my confident, bubbly and funny Bam. You always make me smile young man, seems that you have the talent to make other people smile too. Next stop Britain’s Got Talent!

Mind ‘crammed’ fulness

I’m dragging myself and my boys through the last few days of term. I think dragging is a good term because that’s what it feels like. I don’t want to get up to do another school run, they don’t want to get up either, everyone’s tired and everyone’s fed up!

Nobody prepares parents for the end of school mayhem, the pure exhaustion and the daily occurrence of tantrums and tears (mine and theirs) that can push even the most calm parent to their limits!

My mind is so crammed full I’ve found myself in some amusing situations this week. Yesterday I diligently made packed lunches for my children the night before they required them, only to find the next morning the lovingly made sandwiches were not in the fridge. No, they were in the pan drawer, all sweaty and horrible! Why on earth I put them in there I do not know! I have no recollection of doing it!

And then there was misplacing my car. So I drove to school, got side tracked and walked home. Only to arrive home to an empty driveway – ooops, I left the car at school! At least I didn’t leave the child at home!

It’s very clear that my mind is full of who needs to be where when, who has an end of year party, who is in a school play as well as making sure every teacher that has supported my boys over the past year is presented with a gorgeous thoughtful gift!

While my mind is full, Mops is an emotional wreck! His first year of school is over, he’s exhausted. In fact every time I speak to him he cries. At night he cries because he loves his teacher so much he doesn’t want to be taught by somebody else next year.

Bam on the other hand is bursting, literally bursting with energy. ADHD and end of the school year are not the best combination! He’s bouncing around thrilled that the school holidays will soon be here and he wants to share with the world how happy he is!!

So to all the other parents out there that are experiencing end of term ‘mind crammed fullness’, we’re nearly there! Just a couple more days to drag the family through then no more school runs, school uniform, homework and after school clubs for a whole 6 weeks! That’s got to be something to look forward to!

 

 

 

 

 

Back 2 School!

Fun days out (even time at the beach) are now very much behind us and back to school preparation has descended upon our household! School shoes that have seen better days and PE kit t-shirts that were once white now a mud-stained mess will be replaced. School uniform that has been sitting waiting to be labelled since the start of the last term might finally get a label on it! Oh and not forgetting the end of the holidays hunt for the school reading and library books!

I know I have had two weeks to complete all of these tasks but somehow the time has just slipped away, leaving me rushing around at the last minute worrying about getting it all done! I’m sure I’m in good company though, right?!

As I’m running around getting the last minute tasks done I’m reminded of a conversation I had with Mops in the first couple of days of the holidays. We were in the car and he said ‘Mum, I’m not sure holidays from school is a good idea?!’ Hmmm, where is this going?! All children love school holidays, don’t they? So I replied ‘Why’s that then?! ‘ ‘Well I’m going to forget how to do my ‘j’s’ At the time I thought how cute is that!

Now, as I’m rushing around worrying about the return to school, work etc I’m wondering what the boys worries are?! Will Mops have remembered how to do his ‘j’s’? Is that going to bother him tomorrow or will he just stroll in to school not even giving it a second thought?

Who knows, we’ll see what tomorrow brings! Meanwhile, good luck to all those parents out there that are going to be battling the shops today for those last minute school necessities!  Have a good first day back! Oh and Mops I can’t wait to see all your ‘j’s’ xxx

The goodbye kiss!

Nothing really prepares you for your baby, the youngest baby in your nest starting school. So that moment when my baby started school was an emotional one…I can honestly say I really didn’t want him to go!

Why? I knew he would be absolutely fine. He’s such a bright little chap and although not keen to go to school (he prefers playing with his mates) he’s actually fine about it.

But when I put the school uniform on him to check it fitted I had a lump in my throat and was holding back the tears. How did his baby years fly by this quickly? I’m not ready for this!

So when the his first day arrived I wasn’t sure how I would feel. I knew it wasn’t about me, it’s about my baby, my baby taking his first step into independence. Bam, my eldest was running around the house with excitement, his brother was finally going to school which in his eyes meant he would no longer miss out on activities when his brother was at home and he was at school. It was now an even playing field.

So with uniform on, we headed off to school…only til 11.50am but that was long enough for me. He headed into the classroom with a confident stride listening to the teacher explaining what he needed to do. Then it came to the all important first goodbye. Don’t worry I didn’t cry – no chance for that! He literally looked at us and said ‘bye’. Bye, that’s it! kiss

And every day since the same has continued, no kisses, just bye. On one day I even explained at age 4 it’s the law, you have to give Mummy a kiss goodbye, to which he answered ‘no it’s not Mum’

Ok, ok, you’ve developed some small wings, go and have loads of fun sweetheart.